Money and women are the most sought after and the ...

Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie' until you can find a rock.

Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need.

The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, 'How is the president?'

After you're older, two things are possibly more important than any others: health and money.

Talk is by far the most accessible of pleasures. It costs nothing in money, it is all profit, it completes our education, founds and fosters our friendships, and can be enjoyed at any age and in almost any state of health.

There is nothing in socialism that a little age or a little money will not cure.

Save your money. You're going to need twice as much money in your old age as you think.

The age of a woman doesn't mean a thing. The best tunes are played on the oldest fiddles.

I think women should start to embrace their age. What's the alternative to getting older? You die. I can't change the day I was born. But I can take care of my skin, my body, my mind, and try to live my life and be happy.

Few women, I fear, have had such reason as I have to think the long sad years of youth were worth living for the sake of middle age.

Wives are young men's mistresses, companions for middle age, and old men's nurses.