Famous Quotes About funny

Every man has his follies - and often they are the most interesting thing he has got.

Never floss with a stranger.

The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly.

If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets.

Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt, not swallowed.

Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.

Television has changed the American child from an irresistable force to an immovable object.

Have enough sense to know, ahead of time, when your skills will not extend to wallpapering.

I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something's wrong with me.

I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career.